Trip to the doctor

It' s been almost a year since my first miscarriage but it wasn't until my second miscarriage when I found out that I had APAS which caused both miscarriages. It was on my second miscarriage when my OB told me to visit the Immunologist that he recommended. For some reason I was delaying it. Maybe because I was too afraid on what the Immunologist was going to say or I didn't want to go through the emotional stress anymore.

Finally I was able to get the strength and decided to see the Immunologist tomorrow to have myself checked before we try to get pregnant again and hubby had no second thoughts about it. But he was actually honest enough to tell me the other night that he is scared and so am I. We don't really know what to expect. All we know is that its going to be a difficult process financially, emotionally and physically (for me). Instead of focusing on that, I want to keep a positive outlook and think that if at the end of it all we will be blessed with our own bundle of joy, then all the pain and hardships will be worth it.

I just pray to God everyday that He gives us the strength and His continued guidance to surpass all the challenges and the blessing of having a normal and healthy baby. Sometimes I don't even know if its right for me to ask God for it to happen soon --- but I am just human. I hope He understands. I try to live by the title of a story Bo Sanchez published "Dont Give Up. Do What You Can. And Let God Surprise You."

Hopefully in time God will grant our wish and bless us.